Wednesday, June 20, 2012

If I Fall I Will Get Back Up

Photo: I will NEVER give up!!
Those of you who read my last blog know that I had gone through my first binge in months about a week and a half ago. I beat myself up over it a lot. But then I decided that I was not going to let it defeat me. I was going to get up and charge forward with a firmer resolve. And that's just what I did. I decided that I needed to cut out peanut butter and nut butters completely. It was becoming to hard for me to just have 1/2 T with my meals. Plus I found myself using my finger to run it around the inside of the jar and sometimes more than once. That is also what had started my binge a week and a half ago. So in place of the peanut butter I have been using more almonds and avocado and goat cheese here and there as well. I also began weighing out my oats and protein powders and let me tell you, 1/2 cup of oats ain't no 40 grams, more like 60 grams. Wow, what an eyeopener. and the same with protein powders. Really something to keep in mind. You may be overeating different things without even knowing it. I challenge you to try weighing something after measuring it to see how accurately it lines up. You may be surprised. I'm happy to say that since my binge on the 8th my eating has been completely on point, not one ounce or gram off. I enjoyed a delicious refeed last weekend in which I adapted a recipe and made raspberry banana pancakes with waldon farms syrup. Yum! So good and followed that meal with some Spaghetti Squash Spaghetti and corn. I enjoyed it very much. 
Well today was check-in day with my trainer. It has been a month since my last check in and I was pretty excited to see what progress I had made. Last month I had dropped almost 4% body fat as well as gained almost 3 pounds of muscle while only losing 2.5 pounds. Well since that last check in once again I had found the scale up 2 weeks in a row and has finally leveled back out. 
Ryan seemed very happy with my V-taper and he measured me, I weighed in, he tested my body fat and practiced some posing then took pictures. 
I was pretty excited to see the results of the measurements. When I came out from changing and Ryan got them figured them out, I have to say, I was pretty disappointed. My body fat hadn't gone down even a tenth of a percentage. The scale was only down 1.5 pounds from 138.5 to 137.0. My waste measured at an inch bigger than last week? WTF??? Hips were down from 36 and 3/4" to 36 and 1/8". My left thigh was down about 1/2" and my left arm was down about 1/4". I have to say I was feeling pretty frustrated. Like really. I work so hard every single day and this is the only progress I get? Ryan also added an additional session of Cardio. So now my extra SS will be Monday, Tuesday and Thursday evenings. 
I just felt kinda in a funk. Well today was progress pic day on my Facebook group Team Fit and I was like, ok, well, I guess I see some more definition in my back so I'll post a side by side of my back progress pics. And I started to get comments on the pic. "Your legs look amazing!!! And the rest of you does too!"  "Wow...seeing some changes in your legs! Looking great!" "OH YES, I see changes in the thighs and waist! You're doing it girl" "Thighs look Great...waist, calves, back looks really good and your booty too. GREAT JOB!!"  These are just a few of the comments. So much encouragement from my fit family.  This made me take a look at the pics and realize, you know, this was just 4 weeks. There is definitely progress. I am busting my butt and there is progress, little by little. Changes don't happen overnight and I WILL make it to the stage and I WILL be the best that I can be up there.  Ryan says we will really start cutting at 12 weeks out so I have about 3 and a half weeks left of the muscle building phase. Then I will hopefully really start to show some definition. 
I am very proud of where my lifts are at. Back squats I did 205 this week and deads I'm at 185. Bench I'm 135 but I did do one set of 140. So I do see progress in my strength. 
Well here are the pics. I would love any feedback you all have to give. 


  1. You look STUNNING!!! I am so proud of you... Your hard work shows.... Your an inspiration. When I see you & read about your progress it makes me realize...I need to kick it up a FEW notches!! You go girl!!!! Xoxoxo

    Love you,

  2. amazing changes! you really see it all over but in your legs especially! Great job!

  3. So grateful you're sharing your journey! You really look fantastic! I see LOTS of definition, especially for being in a build phase! Go girl!!!